I'm a bully

Have you ever called yourself out on anything before? Well today as I sit here and type this, I'm admitting to you all that I am a bully. It hurts for me to say it, but it sucks that it took an episode of Arthur to make me see it. 

Scene set:

I'm sitting on the floor pumping and watching this cartoon with the kids, hoping they stay calm long enough for me to get this done. The next thing I know, the Arthur episode is the human people part in a classroom of kids. These kids are reading poems in groups of what they think bullying looks, feels and sounds like. This one stuck, "Bullying is black, it's blue and it's grey. It hurts.". 

I realized in that moment I'm NOT setting the example I need to be for the kids. I will admit that some of the things that come out of my mouth are mean. I get caught up in the moment when the girls are fighting or fighting with me or throwing a fit. ALL parents do. 

I'm reading a book right now (yes-I'm MAKING the time), here's what it's called:

Granted it's really funny, and makes me NOT feel alone as a parent in this world with my crazy thoughts (you all should read it too!), it's also making me see that I need to try so much harder. I'm not at all saying I'm a failure, but since I've been at home these past 4.5 months (seems like 4 years), this has been the biggest challenge life has thrown at me-mommy hood. 

Hearing Iz say "I've had enough of you already today" (yes I'm guilty of saying that a few times with bad behavior around me) to me (at 8 am) is a little over the top for me. I talk to her about this, but I also need to stop and think before I speak (easier said than done-I know!). 

We watch Ellen everyday at 4. Both the girls know the song and yell Ellen's name when it starts. Every ending she says "Be kind to one another"....I am going to enforce that into my home and stop being a bully. 

These kids are SO innocent and are learning everything from me! I get to teach them life lessons, good manners, and so on! Everyone tells me they're so good, so I know I'm doing something right!

Iz was so proud of her flowers today and I will let her pick flowers until she grows tired of it. It makes her happy! 

This boy is innocent beyond all measures. No matter how hard he fought sleep today, he still sucks me into his sweetness and I can never get enough of him!

This girl is tough! Being pulled around like a rag doll by her sister-she falls and doesn't even cry. She said "owie". She is a stinker, but smarter than all get out! Both girls are big critical thinkers and I will make sure they go far in life! :-) 

So if you know you've said something you didn't think was all that nice when you were mad at your kid today-you're NOT alone. You know you love them and so do they. Just try harder tomorrow to say it in a different way. We need to see what they see-a huge world that is good. I think a lot of people would be happier if we all realized this. :-) 

Ok-enough with the heavy tonight! 

Until tomorrow

Doesn't everyone watch tv with their car seats?